'The Heart of Coaching'
Commentary by: Nicholas Romain/DLS SW

I believe it was Vince Lombardi himself that once said "winning isn't everything, it's the only thing". Perhaps 'winning' should be redefined based on what the objective of the coach is, because at different levels of play there are as many different views on what constitutes winning: Some (mostly youth coaches) place the most value on teaching life skills and lessons to their players, regardless of the outcome on the scoreboard; others, place all their value on teaching the game itself, again, regardless of the outcome on the scoreboard ( I believe they all want to win the competition at hand, but at what cost); and then again, others just want to win games to satisfy themselves, their team, school, or the people around them - if this is the only motive, then I believe this is called 'caving into the pressure'...and, there are those rare coaches that put such a great value of personal worth on each individual player that they always seem to do the right thing, and they always 'win', regardless of the scoreboard (and usually on the scoreboard, because they personafi what great coaching is). As a former athlete, and very competitive person, I've had the opportunity to play for various coaches, but have also enjoyed time in the coaching ranks. It always makes me feel great when a former player of mine comes up and hugs me and still calls me coach - it makes my heart feel good, because as a coach I always put my full heart into reaching out to my players, teaching them, looking at the big picture, but I was also competitive and sometimes slipped up and let the scoreboad get in my path of doing the right thing, but this is not about me. It is, however, about coaching in general, and the players, people playing a game, and coaches, people entrusted to do what is right for and by those players, especially at the youth, high school, even college level. 

Alright, to get it out of the way: College and Pro Coaches are paid very well to do a job, theirs is to win the competition they are paid to coach and to build revenue streams for their respective school or pro-franchise - it's a business folks - but, this is more about all those other coaches in the ranks of non-college or pros. The college and pro coaches are held to many standards and conditions, plus sometimes a cruel spotlight of bitter scrutiny - again, while they too may 'teach and preach' with heart, they are being paid to produce results, bottom line! But, the youth coaches, those coaches that have the ability to mold and shape a kids life, they are the focus of this article - because, when you throw out all the high contractual demands, salaries, and even job security (that youth coaches don't receive), these coaches are then left with what: power and flexiblity, even to the point of writing their own standards of perfomance to some degree - and it is left to these coaches to create their own style and method of coaching, and in essence, to define their own definition of 'winning'. 

As I mentioned earlier, I've had the opportunity to 'teach and reach' many young people as a youth coach, and while I draw experience from that, most of what I write here comes from being a sports consultant for over twenty years. I've had the great opportunity to interview, play golf with, dine with, and even partnership with many great coaches and athletes, so I draw some of my conclusions from those relationships. Perhaps the best and most inspirational talk I've ever heard (and I've heard many) was from ESPN analyst, Dick Vitale. It was at the 1994 World Youth Sports Festival's Opening Ceremony Dinner - over 160 AAU teams from around the world competed for a full week in basketball and volleyball (males and females), my company had the production contract on the event so I spent the week with Dick and many coaches.  With the intensity of a great athlete and a heart full of love, Dick spoke about the 'Biggest game of all, the game of life'....it was all inspiring, and I'll never forget the key thing he said: "Coaches, don't get caught up in the scoreboard of winning, but look at your athletes as people, the leaders of tomorrow, build them up, and teach them lessons they can use to become better people, 'send the right message' because, that's what it's all about; and you young people, do the right thing, on and off the field, play hard, but respect your team, your coaches, your opponents, and your mom and dads, because then, and only then will you win in the greatest game of all, the game of life" - I was moved to tears - because in twenty minutes, this sweat-drenched former basketball coach, had left it all on the podium. Afterwards, I asked Dick, 'what makes a great teacher and coach'? Here's what he had to say: "The ability to put one's own needs, and desire to win a game, on hold long enough to 'send the right message' or statement of what should be done to make each player on the team a better person by always doing what is right, on and off the field, and the ability to build up their confidence". "It's all about rewarding each other." I never, until now, really got the full impact of that statement. 'Rewarding - send the right message - instill confidence - rewarding what?

As the years past, I've asked that same question to the likes of Pat Riley, Joe Theisman, George Steinbrenner, and Pat Summitt (just to name a few), and many youth coaches and players. Each time, it all comes back the same: Rewarding - instilling comfidence -teaching and rewarding players for doing what is right - sending messages of respect! Reward what to the players? 

Players want just a few things, to be treated fairly, be respected, and to be given an opportunity to play (that's why we call them players). But what is right behavior, what determines what is fair, right, and just - this is where youth coaches have the power to either rise or fall short of that ultimate goal - are you a coach? Do you have the ablitity to rise above all the politics, favortism, and do what's right: Do you know how to instill confidence by rewarding good behavior and hard work, reward them with playing time and true respect, because, they are the leaders of tomorrow. So many times, I've seen coaches give into the politics of pleasing those players that perform the best on the playing surface, or have parents that put the most money or time into a program, not taking into consideration the players behavior off the field, or even sometimes on the field. All for the sake of winning on the scoreboard or padding their own egos! What about the message being sent? What about those players that do everything asked of them (and have skills), and eptiomize the student athlete, on and off the playing surface, but sometimes get overlooked with playing time because of coaching bias, what does that do to their confidence? What message is being sent to those players (who are the real leaders of tomorrow)? Coaches need to be strong minded and stand firm against the politics around them, against their own selfish desires, and do what is right in the biggest game of all, the game of life!

Standards of Excellence or Failures of Fear!

I had the opportunity this past week to speak with what I consider to be some 'very good' local coaches . Here's what a few of them see as coaching poblems (at our youth and high school level) that keep some coaches from being considered 'Great Coaches' (keeping in mind, there is also a lot of good being done everywhere):

In no particular order
1) Parental Influence: parents get way to involved (during, before, and after games) putting undue presssure on the coaches and even their sons and daughters. (great coaches don't seem to have this problem or many other problems)

2) Favortism: Coaches, like players, often have a club affiliation and may tend to favor those particular club players on their school team, or they personally know the coach, or family member, that a player plays for. Coaches are people too and may have good friends that have kids playing her/him.

3) Give in to the Pressure to win games at all cost: Perhaps a talk with Dick Vitale would help clear this up.

4) Inablitiy to read players emotions, therefore not able to instill needed confidence.

5) Listening to unfounded rumors.

6) Motivated by personal desires only and not 'really committed' to the team.

7) Failure to reward some kids who give 100%, show up for practice on time, and are great students and good citizens.

8) Failure to punish (by not rewarding) those that violate school/team rules (such as drinking alcohol and/or doing drugs: a big problem in our schools today), cause team descension, or have off the court behavior problems. Sending 'it's ok messages'. Not Standing Firm with these players only hurts everyone, especially the player!

9) Failure to stand up to the politics around them and do what's right. (lacking XXXXX)

10) Not having open communication (2 way process) enough with players, often playing them out of position, and wondering why they aren't being productive or ever say anything.

11) Failure to develop all their players through adequate and fair playing time. It takes time, once in a game, for most athletes to get a good feel for the game itself...failure to develop all team players usually shows up at seasons end by a team having a 'short bench'.  Also, starting is over-rated, it's really about playing time, however, players like to start. (start: to begin.) Great coaches mix their starting line-ups occasionally based on effort (or lack of) put forth in practice, and a players overall attitude (Bob Knight was great at doing this/and oh yes, he is just the all time winning college basketball coach).

12) Failure to take players out of a game that are giving less than 100% on the field, just because they have talent or personal 'favortism' by the coach. 

13) HARBORING ILL FEELINGS TOWARD A PARENT(s) AND TAKING IT OUT ON A PLAYER! (this should never happen)

(something most coaches also mentioned: Those they considered to be great coaches are usually also great parents or teachers, fully understanding the gift of how to put one's own wants and personal desires on hold for another...also noted, nothing can teach true and great parenting, it must be experienced)

In summary, 'Great Coaches' know how to build 'Great People' by rewarding! And every action, or no action, taken sends a message of some type. With all the above comes my own opinion: Most coaches try and do their best, and when it comes down to it, some have the ability to win at the game of life and be great, and some don't, many times it's a reflection of how they were taught to coach...or coached, or raised, and/or is a reflection of their own personal character on and off the field.  In every vocation, there are givers and takers, some that get it, and some that don't. But, coaching is a tough job, and the ones that 'Rise Above the Challenge' and have gained the respect of former players, parents, and other coaches, are the ones that have learned to make the right decisions (the ability to put one's own needs and desires on hold and provide a reward system...) and as Dick Vitale puts it, "To win at the biggest game of all, the game of life".